Use of self and self disclosure in coaching
by Marjorie Shackleton & Marion Gillie. 2010.
Notes from a workshop at the Academy of Executive Coaching conference 2010
Gestalt holds that change happens through relationship. The importance of the quality of the relationship between coach/client is not exclusive to Gestalt of course, but Gestalt does bring a perspective, which is quite different from conventional wisdom.
The ‘self’ is not a semi-fixed entity that endures over time. Instead ‘self’ is a process, always in flux and totally contextual, it is a function of what gets evoked in the interaction between individuals under the unique set of circumstances of that particular interaction.
Simply put, the ‘me’ that I experience when I am with my boss is likely to be different in some respect from the ‘me’ that I experience when I am with my best friend etc.
The implication of this for coaching is that you, as coach, are a critical aspect of the client’s experience and how you ‘show up’ will inform (not necessarily consciously) what the client chooses to reveal.
Two aspects of the way you work as a Gestalt coach are critical: your presence/use of self and your ability to engage in dialogue.
Download a copy of the working paper Use of self and self disclosure in coaching.